My first week of intern

It needs only 2 days for me to realise how good going to school is.

I'm currently working in NanYang Press Holding Berhad's Life Magazine. I woke up at 6.45am which is quite hard for me since I usually wake up around 7.30-8.00. And the office is located far from where I'm living at.

Basically I need half an hour or less than that to reach the office provided that the traffic is smooth, like on Saturday. However when it comes to weekdays, I need to spend one hour or even more than an hour to reach the office.

I need to use DUKE hwy, follow by NKVE and exit from Subang tol every morning. I was back using LDP, then SPRINT, finally DUKE, it needs one hour or more than that for me to reach home. I find it very annoying and of course time wasting.

I started to miss school. I need only 15 min or less than 15 min to go school from where I stay.

Food is also one of the problem. Like usual I always like homemade food but it is so tiring for me to cook after coming back from work so I get my dinner outside like from food stalls

Thousands words can express how tired and frustrated I am. I don't even want to go out on Sunday all I want to do is just sleep and read my novel.

Stay strong since there's 13 more weeks to go.

睡睡醒醒

上星期回去每个人都说我瘦了
连我自己也是这么认为的

其实我昨晚11.30睡觉

左roommate 平时都是12.30放工回家.
然后我被惊醒了
以为她会睡觉，
怎么知道接下来闻到一阵香水味，然后关门声，她又出去了

接着我翻来覆去，反反复复，在我真的就快要睡着时
右roommate回来了!
然后我再次被惊醒

又翻来覆去，不知过了多久，我真的真的快要睡着了
怎么知道左roommate又回来了
然后我又一次被惊醒
甚至干脆起身爬去书桌拿电话看时间.
3.36am

再躺回去，睡不着
起身，就这样，4.28am.
然后我就没有意识什么时间再睡着

拜托小姐们除了星期一10点，我天天都是8点的课

搬来这里一个月我几乎天天半夜都会被惊醒.
几乎天天都睡不好

每次晚上我都有种冲动想告诉她们到底可不可以顾及到我这个要早起assignments又很多的可怜虫
可是我没有.我在被窝里偷偷告诉自己忍一忍，绝对不可以发脾气
一定要学习和别人好好相处
除了生活习惯不一样之外，其实她们人都不错
生活上并不是全部都是如意的事情


阿弥陀佛我不是故意要说别人的不是
可是我没有办法憋住不发牢骚.


Next Monday's Timetable.

8am-10am : Journalism II
10am-12pm : M'sia Constitution Framework and Policies
12pm-2pm : PhotoJournalism (P)
2pm- 4pm : PhotoJournalism.

8 hours classes continuously. just take a gun and shoot me !

做梦

这两天都睡不好
睡眠内都是梦境
被梦乍醒后起来，再睡下去依旧还是梦
无止境的漫漫长梦

两天早晨起床觉得很累
或许不睡还不那么累

disappear

sometimes i trust it will never happened again, but obviously it failed, again and again throughout so many years.
i get it enough !
and the situation tends to get worsen when i'm getting mature though i'm trying harder and harder to get thing solved.

but god knows they will never end. never ever.

i have to deal with anything, that's why when i'm alone, i try not to involve myself in human communication but silent, no why, just get sick of it.

how long i should stand for this situation? how long it needs to end?
tell me when will i have the chance to escape from this hell. tell me when.

there's sometime i used to remain silent, to evade all these matters, but this action couldn't help in solving the problems.

but on the other hand, i really wish i am here to solve and make everything better, though it is tough
but it is my responsibility. and i love them.

i know i am the only one who can make these problems become better, better at least.
but i have to hide the real me.

no cries no worries just be happy and be optimistic
when facing these dilemmas.
the real me inside, unable to tell anybody.

i don't mean to face and suffer all these shit ! it hurts me deeply, mentally and emotionally.
deep inside my heart is broken into pieces, hardly recover or never recover perhaps.

it is hardly for me to come back anymore once i step out of this country, just if i am giving a chance.
i'll go as far as i could. my heart will never be complete and i just want to leave this hell

i know i should appreciate and feel lucky of what i am having now. i truly appreciate, i feel blessed.
there's no perfect in this world, i understand this. what can i do is just try my best.
to make everything better, nicer, happier. 

sometimes, how i wish i could just disappear, just like this.

日光灯

当desmond说，整副日光灯要换一副新的时候

突然间晴天霹雳霹雳晴天，我们连午觉都睡不着了

每次山穷水尽的时候，总会有些事情出来狠狠打击你一番